This past year since I graduated college has been the most emotional roller-coaster ride of my lifetime thus far. I experienced so much self-doubt, self-sabotage, feelings of worthlessness and self-pity, questioning everything in my life from the ground up. Only recently, I felt like I hit rock bottom. I felt like I had nothing to offer to anybody, I felt like a shell, a ghost in a body just riding out each day trying to find some sort of form in the seemingly formless. Soul-searching was a daily effort, and nothing seemed to be working. I just didn’t know what the hell I wanted to do with my time. I over-thought everything, every situation, every minute I spent doing or not doing. I tried to create a master plan for my life, I tried to create meaning in my days- but ultimately I was forcing all of this.
It wasn’t until I had a complete and utter breakdown one night, and I felt so low, and realized that I had compromised so much of my own happiness and my ability to truly enjoy this period of my life, that the next morning I forced a shift in my attitude. I decided that I would no longer put so much pressure on myself to be perfect. I decided I would put faith in time, consistency, and hard work. I decided to wake up every morning with love in my heart for myself. I have always been good at loving others, but it has taken me a long time to love myself. I decided that I will not let myself waste these beautiful years of my life in depressive patterns of self-pity and inconsolable expectations.
I am in a good place right now. And I want to let anyone know who reads this, anyone that feels that they are in a pit right now, I want to tell you with complete faith that it always gets better. Keep trying.
Drunk Girl’s friend messaged Psyonix, the makers of Rocket League, and showed them this song, ironically while he was a bit drunk. The sound guys loved it and added it to the game’s soundtrack. It is a perfect fit imo, but also a really fun song. And I’m not sure why but this song makes me super nostalgic for college.
Thanks for the recommendation, Rob. Ashe has a captivating voice, I’ve posted a song featuring her about two months ago. I’ve never heard of Whethan before, but after hearing this track he’s got another fan. Looking forward to more.
Edit: Just looked at Whethan‘s soundcloud page, and he remixed one of my favorite songs, “Falling” by Opia. So I posted it here for your listening pleasure. Enjoy!
School is coming closer and closer to an end, and I feel less of a pull toward posting… usually until I actually make a post and realize how important it is to me. I didn’t get to see Gallant at Coachella, but I heard his set was amazing. Never heard of Atlantic Connection before, but this remix of The Weeknd’s The Morning is pretty damn solid.